February 24, 2009
Back to ME! In my last practicum, I took on way too much. I was involved in a number of groups, attempted things that, looking back, were over my skill set, and basically got to a point where I overwhelmed myself and got angry at the process. I didn't do enough to keep the balance between learning and practice. And the fact is that this practicum is NOT about gaining job experience, it is about learning how to do the job of social worker, and how to apply the knowledge that you've gained in that area. There is a difference. A difference that some people simply can not see.
When I got into this practicum, I kept an eye on balance. However, the smorgasbord of opportunities stared me in the face and DARED me to reject them. Add into that the expectations that my supervisors had about what they wanted me to do, and here I am again, in that place where I have to reevaluate what I'm doing and why.
I have decided that I am cutting back on my workload and responsibilities. I want to take time to reflect on my experiences, go to resources and look at them closer, and seek feedback on what I'm doing. At this point, I don't need to see if I can handle a full caseload. That's not the point of this. Someone out there will give me the opportunity to do that...I'm sure of that. Right now I need to take the time to do the things that will not only nurture my future practice, but to nurture myself.
Sigh...reading all that just makes me thing "Oh my god, I'm SUCH a social worker..."