March 6, 2009

Random Practicum Thoughts II

I have too many things going on in my head, so a longer post about a single thing seems like it would be a waste. I'm going to try to get a few things out of my head so I can just relax and enjoy my weekend.

  • I've noticed that I'm asking people to be kind to themselves in their recovery and lives. The funny thing is that when I ask the same from myself, I get resistance.
  • Practicum supervisors should be required to take a course on supervision before taking on a student. My sit-down supervision is ridiculous. It feels more like an oral test than supervision. Bleh.
  • It's amazing to watch a group come together as a support system. The fleeting eye contact becomes more connected, the stories more personal and the reflection more supportive. Very cool.
  • I love sitting down with a worker or peer and finding that you're on the absolute same page, when you had an idea that they were way off in left field (or you were, for that matter!). It's soul soothing.
  • No-shows suck.
  • Sometimes a session with a client goes so smoothly and wonderfully that I come out of there beaming. I hope the feeling is mutual.
  • With one month to go, I'm at that place where I feel I'm just getting into the swing of things, but I also want it to be over. It's also a place, this time, where I look at the other practicum options I had and wish I had made a different choice. I see people in other placements getting challenged, nurtured and praised, while my roller coaster ride of a placement leaves me feeling...fragile.

That is all. Time to go out there and have some "me" time. I'm going to be gentle with myself today...


T. J. said...

I loved your post! So honest. I am sorry you don't have a "good" field instructor. I think I lucked out. And I never would have imagined it the first day I met the person. In fact, I wanted a different practicum.

I am so grateful that my Higher Power had a better plan! The person who went to the agency I was certain I should have been assigned to has little to no direct client contact and rarely gets face time with her field instructor.

I am really sorry the supervision is like an oral exam for you! YUCK. (Isn't it ironic that the dentist is also an oral exam!)

So, you struck a REALLY BIG chord with the statement about being really good at telling others to take time for themselves, yet you are resistant to the same advice. I am so there with you. Do you think it's because we are in school, work, etc. and we aren't giving ourselves a break? I do.

So, for spring break: it's off to the mountains for me. I will rent a bicycle, get several massages, facials, salt scrubs and whatever else I can afford. I will hang out with my husband of 10 years. I will take walks in the woods and breathe.....

How about you? Why not make a pact with yourself to be your best bud? I'm pulling for ya!

--Ms. T. J.

antiSWer said...

TJ: I'm trying to be good to myself. I took myself out to a movie today. That's something I haven't done for a while. I'm trying, slowly, to be kinder to myself. That part of my life has really gotten away from me lately.

Thanks for the encouragement!

cb said...

Sounds tough and sorry to hear that but I'm sure that lessons are being drawn out - not least, how not to supervise. And it is well-known that it is far easier to tell others what to do than to do it yourself. Take care.

Anonymous said...

Sorry that it has been so tough. But try to remember lessons to be learned are every where. Sometimes, when you're not able to get what you need from someone you can find someone else to turn to, even if it's not in an official capacity.

SocialWkr24/7 said...

I know exactly how you feel - and sadly, this is my full time job! But I'm still being grateful for the experience - or trying to be anyways - no shows make it very difficult. Do take care of yourself!

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