Coming to a close

After weeks of frustration, elation, stress and a bit of wisdom gained, my practicum is coming to a close. I, and many of my classmates, will be done in the next little while, ready to take on the world as idealistic social workers.

I enjoy hearing about my classmates experiences, as for the most part, they have all been positive. People have been brought along slowly, challenged appropriately and given decent feedback on their performance on which they can build.

As for me, those things have been few and far between. My direct supervisors were ill-prepared to take on a student, and that has made my placement suffer. I saw this from the beginning, but I had hope that it would improve. It really hasn't. I have had to reach out to other people where I am doing my practicum to gain the experience I need.

It's kind of sad, actually. I reached out to this one person, and sitting with them, I realized the kind of experience I would have gained had they been my supervisor. In the short time that I have worked with them, they have brought me along, thrown me in where they saw I could, and challenged me where appropriate. With them, I get the feedback that I have been sorely lacking. Oh, what could have been...

But I refuse to end this post on a negative note! Looking back, I have learned a hell of a lot in this practicum. I have learned SO much about myself as a person and future clinician, I have learned that the system is pretty messed up, but you can still do good work within it, I have learned that you can be a crappy social worker even if you have the appropriate letters after your name, and I have learned that I will succeed in this line of work. I know myself so much better than I did before.

My role as a social worker feels natural. Finally! I have struggled with that all through my BSW. Moving out of my role as a social work student, to being a social worker, into my MSW program simply feels right. One of the things that I've learned about myself is that the situations that I have a certain slight nervousness about are the things that I gain the most from. Having said that, I can honestly say that I am slightly nervous about the future. But with that exists a strong anticipation and hopefulness.